You Are Enough
Glen / 
62 Comments / 
February 9th, 2009 / 
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I’ve been meaning to write this one for a long time but I’ve struggled to think how I can actually flesh this one out into a full blog post. The main premise is simple: whatever you would like to achieve, whatever you want in life, whoever you want to be: You Are Enough.
We go through life thinking that if we get X then we are going to be happy. If we make enough money or have a flashy enough car then we can attract a desirable partner into our lives. If we could just get this or do that then everything would be perfect. Well guess what? You don’t need anything.
Life Goals and Our Own Drawbacks
I’ve never discussed this on the blog but it’s something that’s been on my mind for a long time. One of my long-term goals with the PluginID brand is to release a book about the ‘ultimate solution’ to Plug into Your Identity, be who you want to be and live the life you want to live. I’ve found methods that work and methods that simply add to the clutter of our already hectic lives.
As part of this journey, I keep an Excel file which contains 3 columns which apply to me personally: Where I Was, Where I Am, Where I Want to Be. So for example, in regards to my career it might be:
- Where I Was: In a dead-end job that I hated (I worked in a clothes store)
- Where I Am: Working full-time from the comfort of my own home
- Where I Want to Be: Running a fully fledged business around the PluginID brand
The reason I say this is that this Excel document contains book and blog ideas, but also many of my life goals; goals that probably apply to most of you. Aspirations for relationships, health, and wealth. When looking at ‘Where I Am’ in regards to ‘Where I Want to Be’ I noticed some recurring drawbacks that aren’t created by anyone but me. I looked at them and always thought that I needed something else to happen for the ambition to occur.
For example, instead of wanting multiple (open and non-serious) relationships and going for that goal, I used to think: “OK so I’m going to focus on my business first so that I can make good money and buy a nice apartment and a car. Then, I’m going to work on my health so that I look better and it’s more likely that people will fall into my life“. Sorry, but it doesn’t work that way.
If you’re happy to wait years to achieve your goals that may or may not come true then that’s up to you. However, that’s not me. Right here, right now, I have everything I need to attract women into my life. In fact, in the past year I proved that to a large extent. This isn’t about me and my relationships though, this is about realising whatever you want in life you can have, right now. You are enough…
You Are Enough
Let’s put that statement to the test shall we. Below I’m going to outline some common goals that people have and some common beliefs around them and see if you relate to any of them.
False Belief No.1) I can’t have an attractive partner because I’m (any or all of the following may apply):
- Not attractive enough
- Don’t have enough money (common belief for men)
- Don’t have the right personality
False Belief No.2) I can’t life a live a life of financial abundance / become wealthy because:
- I’m not smart
- I don’t have the grades or qualifications needed
- I don’t know what I want to do in life
- That kind of thing doesn’t happen to people like me
False Belief No.3) I can’t live happily or be at peace because:
- I was brought up in a difficult environment
- Too much has gone on in my life
- My current situation just wouldn’t allow for it
- There’s too much going on in my head
Unless you are terminally ill and don’t have long to live, all of these beliefs are completely irrelevant. You can attract wealth, health, peace of mind and relationships into your life – period. In fact, even if you are terminally ill you can attract these things into your life, especially happiness and peace.
Correct Belief No.1) Money and looks are totally irrelevant when it comes to ‘attracting’ partner into your life, believe me or not: attraction is not a choice. You may not be able to get that ‘one special person’ that you want, but when you take on reality and realise everything is abundant, that is not going to affect you.
Example: Sean Stephenson (video) is a 3ft tall, 26 year old man, confined to a wheelchair and has multiple beautiful women in his life.
Correct Belief No.2) Did you know that over 50% of CEO’s in the UK do not have any college education, nevermind university degrees? The owner of Marks and Spencers (UK retail store) built his business to be worth hundreds of millions of pounds from nothing before selling it on.
Example: If that isn’t enough, look at me. I failed my first year of college and quit after my second year. Since then, through internet marketing, I’ve got investments worth over $30,000 and their value is growing steadily…at 19 years old.
Correct Belief No.3) Happiness and peace of mind are right here, right now. The reason that we struggle with this is because we always look for things to make us happy. Read this post to get a better idea of what I’m saying here. Also, if you prefer videos for this kind of thing, I recommend ‘Flowering of the Human Consciousness‘ by Eckhart Tolle (that is my review) which really helped me in this area.
In Summary
Whatever it is you want in life, go for it. Believe you can achieve it. If this post didn’t help then take a look at how you can begin to remove your self-limiting beliefs. In theory, Personal Development should be thought of as Personal Diminishment. It’s all about taking away the things that are holding us back from following our dreams and living the life we want to live.
You are enough to do anything you want to do. Accept it; if you need proof then BECOME that proof. Be the shining light that shows other’s it is possible. Look at inspirational videos that show the magic in this world and how lucky we are to be able to have dreams and go out there and achieve them.
The only thing holding you back is you. Cut the cord.
If you enjoyed this post, I would appreciate if you share it on Twitter, Facebook or Delicious!
Glen,
Excellent post! What I think you’ve underlined here is that people often lack the self-esteem to achieve what they want. They use their low self-esteem as an excuse for not trying. It’s basically fear of failure and self-nourishing fears. Because fear is viral.
What you’ve pointed out is that with courage and determination, you can achieve anything in life – and that your situation doesn’t depend on external variables (money, attractiveness, etc…), but on what you’re doing about improving your situation. Many people just lack the courage.
Thanks Glen for an amazing read,
Anthony
Thanks a lot Anthony, great comment. Fear of failure more often than not is to do with our ego’s I think. Something I’m trying to ‘lose’.
So true, thank you!
– Glen
Amazing read, this site really has been an eye-opener for me. Thanks!
Thanks so much Syme, always my intention
Another great post. I think I’ve fallen into the trap of first I’ll get A, then B, then I’ll be ready for C. It’s something I’m going to have to watch out for in the future.
- Dave
The most important thing is that you notice this David, most people don’t get that far
Cheers,
Glen
Those three words hold so much power!
When I started college, those were the first words that my seminar professor told the class. He said, “I know you honors students. No matter how many times we tell you you’re smart, capable, incredibly motivated students, I bet most of you suffer from feeling that what you’re doing is not good enough. STOP. Tell yourself: You are enough. You are enough.”
A good portion of us later revealed to each other that we were about to tear up in class when he said that. Because he was right. That sense of inadequacy can be so crippling. To hear someone tell you that you’re worth it, that you’re enough: It’s incredibly liberating.
Props to you for reminding us that we are all indeed, enough.
Great post!
Wow, thats a great story Maricor, it sounds like he was a great professor as well
You’re welcome, thanks for the comment
just really, really well said! it’s living like a jedi mind master – Mark Shepard
Thanks a lot mark, I appreciate that
Ah, a timely one. It’s nice to hear such a message when I’m stretching myself out on a limb….
ari
Great to hear Ari, thanks for stopping by!
Couldn’t agree more! Self motivation is on going and completely necessary. We are enough, this moment is enough. Everything is enough, we just have to wake up. Thanks for the reminder and keep up the great work!
It sounds like you’re more than half way there Amber
Thank you for such enlightening advice and sharing of your experience.
Karen
You’re welcome Karen. Once again, thanks for your comment and stopping by!
This is a gread post. I’ve never heard it put quite this way, but it certainly is the truth. We are already the person we need to be, we just have to give ourselves permission to be fabulous. The rest will follow.
Thanks Frances, I always write with the aim to inspire, but inspire based on facts rather than disillusion.
Thanks for stopping by!
Fantastic post.
You’re right… Our beliefs more than anything else get in the way of our own dreams.
That’s just the way it is. You’re fortunate to have internalized this so early.
That was really amazing Glen. Everything you said is so true and so good to hear. Definitely going to refer back to this when i have a bad day – Thank You
-krod
Baie Dankie Shanzy
Satisfaction is definitely key to happiness. A lot people are so busy with their life, they forgot to slow down and enjoy what they’ve worked for.
Great message.
Thanks Andre, you’re exactly right, too often we are looking forward instead of focusing on the now
Hi Glen,
I stopped over from your guest post at the Discomfort Zone…
You have a way with words and getting to the heart of the matter!
I think its because you simplify it all.
Thanks for the clarity!
Hey Diane,
Thanks a lot for your comment, I appreciate your kind response
There was me thinking I say too much sometimes
Cheers,
Glen
Great post! From my experiences, the three “myths” are big problems and it’s tough for people to get around them. My goal in life is helping people get rid of them. That’s why I’m actually working on a book right now and it’s with the editor as we speak.
Keep up the great work!
Awesome Richard, I look forward to seeing what your book covers.
Thanks, and thanks for stopping by!
nice post and story bro
have you read Neil Strauss?
Thanks man, I know who he is but I’ve never read his book
This is such a well written post! We can determine our happiness every moment by focusing our thoughts on the positive and not the negative. We have more power than we know to be able to create our future and our life the way we want it to be, simply by becoming aware of our thoughts constantly and modifying the thoughts that made us feel unhappy or apathetic, to feeling happy, inspired and motivated! Thank you for this awesome blog!
Thank you for the kind words Elizabeth, I appreciate it!
False Beliefs?
I don’t think so. What you cite are valid observations. While there is some worth in action oriented optimism, illusions are only disappointing in the end. Oftentimes one pays for the euphoria created by motivational speakers with depression afterwards. Be careful what you believe. It should always be logically integrated with reality.
Thanks for the comment, even though of course I disagree.
Funnily, assuming that you disagree with the post, you are highlighting the exact illusion that many people have. My information sadly, is not from a motivational speaker. It is from my personal experiences.
A former shy guy who couldn’t really get ‘girls’ to going out 5-nights a week, happily going to clubs on my own and meeting lots of women while making tons of friends. Additionally, seeing the friends I make go through the same transformation.
Not to mention the fact that I quit college and not work full-time with my own business. Can you please point out the illusion for me?
(Note: I’m not bragging, it just seems like you are stuck in the conditioned role but haven’t said which point deserved the “i dont think so” comment).
“Can you please point out the illusion for me?”
I didn’t mean your case specifically, but the advice in general. If you have had luck despite your adversarial conditions, that might just be a statistical freak value.
“[...] but haven’t said which point deserved the “i dont think so” comment”
That the three beliefs you cited are false. Usually they are valid — anecdotal evidence notwithstanding.
Fair enough. I fully believe people with difficult backgrounds can still find happiness and peace. I fully believe people who aren’t wealthy can make something for themselves and change that situation around.
Sorry that you have such limiting beliefs.
“I fully believe people with difficult backgrounds can still find happiness and peace.”
Me too. But the question is, how objective those feelings may be. (For example, if you believe in an afterlife where all will be good, or that you need nothing to be happy like in Buddhism, that may give poor people some relief or even contentment, but it is build on nothing more then lies — like a drug induced high. The objectively successful know that.)
“I fully believe people who aren’t wealthy can make something for themselves and change that situation around.”
Again, me too. But the chances are less than 50%, and you have to compensate your shortcomings with a lot of work to succeed. In fact, more work than many can bear. I do not say that one shouldn’t try, but we have to be realistic about our situation (and the political one) as well. The solution is to be more rational than one’s competitors around the world, and to pass valid knowledge as early as possible to our children.
Thanks man! This post was just what I needed to stumble upon during this insane up and down moment in my life. Brings me back to my own train of thought on this. You’ve got yourself a new subscriber now thanks to this post. Cheers!
This is a great post, got the message across, only thing that did not go down that well with me is the constant example of many women being used as a sign of success, as a woman i feel like i’m brought across as a commodity. Quality over quantity…see where im getting at? But again nice post
Hey Nell; first of all, thanks for the comment.
I can maybe see why you would say that, although there are 3 main examples as far as limiting beliefs go and only one is about women. It may be my youth coming through, or it may simply be that this was / is an honest focus of my life that I’m sure many men who are being honest can relate to.
Thanks again!
Great post! We spend so much time looking for resources outside of ourselves when – if we really want to achieve anything worthwhile – it starts from within.
Thanks for the reminder.
G
Even if you are terminally ill and don’t have long to live , YOU decide whether you will be an OBJECT of PITY or are going to live the rest of the days of your life having fun!
Randy Pausch is the perfect example !
I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who currently feels this way. (and who also used to suffer from they thinking they WEREN’T enough)
Social pressures especially, it’s easy to fall into that mindset of constantly needing “more.” Whether it’s more money, more (better) looks, more friends, more degrees, more experience, etc etc yet the reality is that almost anybody can be anything. The most limiting experience a person can have is their own mind, and generally when that can be overcome, the sky’s the limit when it it’s time to unleash your potential.
I love the way you think…
Hi – I justed came across your blog (via the Zero Hour Work Week e-book) and I like it a lot. I believe that this false belief of not being enough is the main cause for most personal problems; I’m glad you address it here.
Looking forward to read more!
“Dream and give yourself permission to envision a You that you choose to be.” -Joy Page
Hey Glen,
Give yourself permission to be awesome and you can do and be whatever you want.
It’s free to imagine, so picture yourself being something you dreamed about. It’s the hardest (and easiest) step, because most people have been convinced–from parents, peers, society–that they can’t be that.
But break through that psychological wall and really see yourself being something, and the dream stops being abstract and becomes a potential reality. You see what concrete steps you’d need to take to accomplish your goal and be who you want to be.
All the best with realizing your goal of building the PluginID brand,
Oleg
…is it sad that this post almost made me cry?
This is probably the most positive thing I’ve ever read. Especially with the schooling part – I really want to go to a writing college in NYC, but my parents are always telling me that my grades are terrible, that I’m not smart enough, that I’ll never have enough money to go. At first I started believing them – until I read this. Thank you for giving me an extra boost in life
Hey great post! We are definitely brought up in society to think we are not enough unless we obtain the things in life which give us “social status”. If we accept this we are giving our life away. To realize you are enough no matter what is to live life only for us.
Thanks,
Mike
Man, I really enjoy your blog today. I felt that you are just a genius to the blogging communities. Yes, that’s right! I mean there’s something inside you that worth a billion pounds. I wish you the best now and in the future as you harness your true calling…
Yours net buddy, Justice
The “not enough” syndrome is something I see in myself and just about everyone I meet in certain areas of their lives. One of the gifts you bring to the blogging community is you remind people of what is possible and in a way they can hear it. Good for you!
In the book The Beneficial Laws of Attraction, author Hope Bradford describe “not enough” as a limiting belief and part of the Fear Triad, along with “better than” and “survival of the fittest,” which are responsible for much of the suffering on earth.
Enough. Different and equal. Support for all. There is enough. Good principles to live from.
Great share.
Coming from a background of being a Pediatric Nurse I missed out on a lot of things because of my limiting beliefs about myself and what i was capable of. When I started doing personal development I began to see that my results were a direct reflection of the thoughts and actions I took.
I really dove into this type of thinking and started to realize I had limiting beliefs that were holding me back from creating this life I said I wanted. I am truly living a life I love now. I now run my own business and get to spend everyday with my husband and daughter. And it is something I would not have accomplished if it was not for moving past those beliefs that tell you you dont deserve more or your not capable of more. For me, its all about taking the actions to transform my limiting beliefs into ones that moved me forward in life, not hold me back.