Personality Development: Be Who You Want to Be
Personality is an interesting subject, and not a topic I wanted to cover until I had thoroughly done my research. After-all, even just the word ‘personality’ means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. Our personality actually plays a huge part in how we perceive the world and how the world perceives us so I think it is an important subject to cover. This site is all about living the life you want to live and being who you want to be and I think it’s safe to say that we each view someone’s personality as a large part of what makes them who they are. With that in mind, let’s look at how you can change yours for your own benefit.
What is Our Personality?I searched around for some definitions of this term and I have to say that my favourite is rather basic: “A set of qualities that make a person distinct from another”. Nice, simple, to the point and the exact definition that I’ve come to think the word means through my 19 years of existence. On top of that statement, I, like many others, believe that our personality includes our beliefs and values so this is the understanding of the word I’m going to use here. Feel free to substitute your own definition and still go through the process towards the middle of this post. How It Is Formed Your current personality, whatever it may be, has been formed in a number of ways. Psychologists have studied human personalities for years and have come to a number of conclusions. First of all, it is believed that certain traits in our character are hereditary, yet things like our values and beliefs are derived from socialization and unique experiences, mostly from childhood. Based on that statement, it’s likely that the personality of you and anyone you know is based on:
- Social experiences (especially from childhood)
- Unique experiences that you have had in your lifetime
- The environment in which you grew up and how you had to act
Designing your Own PersonalityBefore continuing with the following steps on designing your own personality, spend a few minutes thinking of the personalities of people in your life. I have some close friends that I know whenever I see them they will cheer me up because they are happy and very positive. On the other hand, I also have friends that are close, but I can always predict how they will react in certain situations and it is usually in a negative manner. I think all of you can relate to my situation of having friends who you love to be around and other friends who you do care about, but make you feel ‘drained’ when you spend time with them. The whole point of this post and personality development in general is to develop the characteristics you want to have rather than the ones you’ve been conditioned with. Following are four steps that I have personally used in the past month to help bring about a change in my own personality that have allowed me to literally be the type of person I want to be. If you are just a skim reader, do not take any advice in this post. The sections in bold need their descriptions to be read in order to have this process result in the kind of personality that you want.
- 1. Be Honest With Your Current Traits
- 2. Define the Qualities You Want to Have
- Fun / Good sense of humour
- 3. Visualise Yourself for 21 Days with These Qualities
- You must do this for 21 days without missing a day
- You need to visualise yourself being how you want to be in terms of the end result, not the process
- Your visualisations need to be as real as possible – notice smells, colours, small details and sounds from your imagined environment
- 4. Act as If They Are Present